


A Sorting of Sorts

by sonofahutmaker



Category: Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater
Genre: Alcohol, Boys Kissing, Established Relationship, F/M, Fluff and Humor, Harry Potter References, Language, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-28
Updated: 2015-12-28
Packaged: 2018-05-10 00:36:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,012
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5562004
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sonofahutmaker/pseuds/sonofahutmaker
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The gang gets drunk and Blue decides to sort everyone into their appropriate Hogwarts houses.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Sorting of Sorts

**Author's Note:**

> This is super fluffy it's ridiculous.

“Gryffindor,” Blue proudly declared, tapping Gansey lightly on the head. He smiled up at her, eyes catching hers, head tilted against the chair he was leaning on to where Blue was sitting.  
Ronan’s derisive laugh shattered the moment, “GryffinDORK, Gansey, you two are fucking nerds.” There was a good chance that Ronan was drunk, as it was usually only in this state that he was reduced to bad puns. The half-finished bottle of vodka dangling from his fingertips was another indicator. “You too Parrish, don’t look at me like that.” This last remark was directed at Adam, whose lap Ronan’s feet were currently resting in on the sofa they both occupied, and whose gaze had caught on Ronan’s in a long suffering expression.  
“I can’t believe I’m dating a twelve-year old,” came Adam’s response, but his gaze softened. He began lightly running his fingers along Ronan’s legs. It was possible Adam was a little drunk too. They all were, except for Noah, whose ghostliness didn’t allow him to consume any beverage or food, including alcohol. The gang had allowed themselves to give in to Ronan’s prodding and dip into his dream stash of alcohol after a rare Glendower-search victory; with the help of Adam’s interference, the ley-line had been strong enough to reveal a path in Cabeswater which Gansey was sure would lead the waking of Glendower. Gansey was always sure of victory, but this advancement came as a welcome excuse for celebration, and Blue was currently enjoying sorting the boys into their appropriate Hogwarts houses.  
“Noah, you’re clearly a Hufflepuff,” came her next proclamation, which prompted cheering from where Noah sat cross-legged on the floor. Noah was the only other who had read all seven Harry Potter books, and he faithfully watched the movies anytime they were on TV, somehow always knowing with eerie accuracy when they would come on. Noah might not be able to get drunk as a ghost, but he never missed a Harry Potter marathon.  
“Noah, come on that’s the worst house, they’re all a bunch of fucking pansies;” Ronan was often Noah’s companion during these movies.  
While Noah seemed to deflate somewhat, Ronan’s comment only prompted laughter from Blue. Blue gasped around the uncontrollable laughter of the inebriated, “But Ronan,” hiccup, “you’re such a Hufflepuff too!”  
A sharp “ha!” from Noah’s direction interrupted Ronan’s glare at Blue, and Ronan calmly stated, with startling sudden sobriety, “ask anyone, Maggot, I’m a Slytherin.” Blue briefly looked like the drunk idiot she currently was as she attempted to both hold Ronan’s gaze and roll her eyes at the same time.  
“Please, Ronan, my aunts may call you ‘snake boy’ but they’re full of it and so are you. The only Slytherin here is Adam.” Adam jerked to attention from where he had been sleepily tracing up and down Ronan’s calves, quietly giggling to himself at his friends.  
“Wait, aren’t they the bad guys? I’m not a bad guy! Tell her, Ronan, I’m not a bad guy!” Adam interjected indignantly. Despite never reading the books or seeing any of the movies, Adam was sure of this, at least, and was not about to be labeled as evil at what was supposed to be a party.  
“Yeah, well I am!” Ronan continued to insist, his pleas falling on deaf ears.  
“My god, you two deserve each other, at least,” Blue almost shouted to be heard over the din. Ronan had swung his feet off of Adam and the couch to be able to face Blue more fully, and he and Adam were talking over each other in an attempt to get their sortings redacted. Unconsciously, Blue mirrored their earlier position and turned in her chair with her feet dangling over the side, her right hand carding through Gansey’s hair. She continued, “Look, Ronan, you’re dedicated, kind, and loyal when it matters, and you’re not cunning or ambitious at all, so you’re a Hufflepuff. And Adam, you’re like the textbook definition of a Slytherin. Seriously; cunning, resourcefulness, ambition, cleverness,” she ticked off, Gansey frowning at the sudden removal of her hand, “it’s all there. So you are a Slytherin because I decree it so!” This last bit was said with a dramatic flourish, during which Blue almost fell out of her chair and onto Gansey, who burst into laughter.  
Blue looked around the room, searching for Noah to share in her victory, and realized her staunchest supporter had disappeared at some point in her speech. Frowning slightly, Blue continued, “and for another thing,” Blue insisted, not knowing when she had already won a fight and should quit while she was ahead, “Slytherins are not evil! They’re always stereotyped as the bad guys, even in, perhaps, especially in, Harry Potter,” she rambled, jumping onto her chair to emphasize her point,“but-” at this, Blue lost her balance and finally did fall onto Gansey, which really might have been his plan all along, looking at the evidence. Gansey was incriminated by a Cheshire grin and the fact that he had always leapt to his feet to fetch refills for Blue, claiming he was just being chivalrous. To be fair, Blue had accepted every time despite her opinion on the outdated sexism of chivalry, and wasn’t looking too upset at her current predicament.  
Ronan snorted, “subtle, Maggot” and scooted closer to Adam.  
With Blue and Gansey otherwise occupied, Adam asked quietly “You don’t think I’m evil, right?” oddly vulnerable in his drunken state.  
“No, Parrish,” Ronan spoke in a low voice as Adam’s hands went around him, clutching at Ronan’s back, “I don’t think you’re evil at all.” Their lips came together in a soft kiss, Ronan pressing Adam back into the arm of the couch when Adam lightly nipped at Ronan’s bottom lip. “Okay,” Ronan conceded, pulling back slightly, “maybe a little evil.”  
“Subtle, Lynch” Blue called from where she sat in the circle of Gansey’s arms. They both looked supremely content.  
The four were startled by Noah’s sudden reappearance. “Guys,” he exclaimed, “I think there’s a Harry Potter marathon about to come on!”

**Author's Note:**

> okay I am dead sure that Adam is a Slytherin, Gansey is Gryffindor, and Noah is Hufflepuff, but am still unsure about Blue and Ronan; thoughts?


End file.
